Since were are not children anymore we are too conscious of what we're doing. We constantly bear this notion in our minds that everything has to have an aim and a result, that everything we do has to be good enough, that unless the final product is perfect our effort is just a waste of time.
Sometimes we try to take up drawing, playing piano, learning a language or whatever, but if it's no good we just leave it and consider that area closed for us for the rest our lives. But nothing can ever be good for the first time, nothing can ever become good unless we keep on trying and fighting and finding a way.
That's what children do - if they fail, and obviously, they often do, they don't give up - oh, I guess I'm no good in walking, I'm never gonna try again - or - oh, this drawing is lame, I really should stop insulting my mother with such horrible depictions - they just keep on trying. And eventually, they succeed.
And we can too, all we need is to leave our doubts behind, forget that journey seems endless and that we can't see our reward on the horizon. For it is far beyond, but it is there. Once we focus on the journey, on the process and not the result, we'll get somewhere. And once we get somewhere more and more roads, more and more possibilities will open for us.
In other words, you need to go through a lot of shit until you find a pearl. But if you don't go you won't find any.
*
The moment you know you've created something which wasn't there just a while ago is magic. Anyway.
So it seems I am again capable of writing coherent sentences, my very own ones. I mean, I still enjoy cutting stuffings out of other people's pillows and turning them into motorbikes (made of jealousy) - here we go again - which, obviously, I will never ever stop. But I guess it's good to do something properly every once in while.
Consider this going through the lot of shit, all right?
*
We
are
learning
to
love
life
is that right? Oh yes it is. We only got one shot anyway so let's all do our best.
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